so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize