Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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