so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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