Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
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