Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
