There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
ttyl tear gas
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
