i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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