OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
be right there i have to get my cape
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
