First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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