we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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