some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
