Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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