And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
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