I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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