girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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