shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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