Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize