her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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