We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
My vagina just recognized that song.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize