She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Randomize