ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
