just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize