Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize