I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
