I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Randomize