I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
