I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Randomize
