Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
