dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
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