dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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