I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
