she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
