this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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