Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
