Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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