If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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