I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
