It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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