i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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