Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
