Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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