Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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