The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
