Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
