I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
