Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
