Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
