New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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