dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Dignity is for republicans.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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