where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
jump out the window naked night went bad
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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